The Hug from Mother

My mother had me when she was fairly young.  I grew up to be a reincarnated version of her.  Growing up, my mother wasn’t a very affectionate person.  But the affection that she lacked, family gave me.  Her priorities were different when I was a young child but she did the best she could.  The very first hug I got from my mother happened when I called myself running away from home.  I ran away at the age of 10 from the babysitters house to my grandmother's house which was 3 miles away.  When she finally found out she rushed to my grandmother's house.  She yelled at me for a few, then preceded to spanking that ass.  After the spanking she gave me a hug.  Fast forward to the year December 2003 after we got word that we would be heading into Iraq in January, we all went on leave to visit our families.  I didn’t mention much to mother about leaving and going to Iraq.  I just told her that I would be heading over to do nothing and hangout for a year.  I remember sitting at the house with her and doing my will and power of attorney.  She kept saying she didn’t understand why she had to fill one out if I was going over there to do nothing.  But, somehow someway, we managed to fill both of them out.  As my days on leave started to come to an end,  I could tell that she maybe knew I was full of shit about going over to do nothing.  She started to realize that her little boy, her first child had become a man.  She knew that there was a high possibility that she may never see him again.  The dreaded day had come for me to return back to Hawaii and start the path to head into the middle east.  She drove to Ronald Reagan Airport and we didn’t talk very much on the ride.  I didn’t know what to say and I'm sure she didn’t either.  As she put the car in park out in front of departures,  I went to the trunk to gather my things.  We walked towards each other and I told her I would call her when I got back to Hawaii.  She reached out and gave me a quick hug.  A hug no different than what you would give a neighbor or a person you first met.  When the hug was done, she looked at me with a tear in her eye.  Reality had set in.  She pulled me back in a gave me the long hug as she cried and I cried with her.  I had grown up to be a young man, but at the moment I was her child.  The hug she gave me that day, was the hug I had waited my hold entire life for.  It was what I had been missing, to know that she still cared for her first child.  Walking into the terminal, I looked back to see if she was still there.  She was.  I had a doubt in head.  Was this the right thing to do.  Did I want to go over to war just to die.  So that my brothers may live and come home to their families...I would.  I showed the ticket agent my ID Card, accepted my ticket and made my mind up.  I was going to war.  And if I were to lose my life in defense of my brother or my country.. I knew that my mother loved me.